Articles by Crom:
A rainbow sprang forth from the speakers, and made it possible for me to again believe that solid tunes can be produced not only in our day and age, but in our area code as well.
I had been asked a number of times how I would rate the pain: 1 to 10. I asked if there was a higher number available, I said I was dying. To be fair, I really thought I was.
Let’s get one thing straight, I don’t drink rye all that often. In fact I hold firm to the belief that when you drink rye, you’re basically priming yourself to get into a fist fight.
Crom’s subject this issue is The Ever Living devil priest of Third Earth. The sound of his maniacal laugh emenating from his dreaded Black Pyramid makes the blood run cold of any man, woman, or feline.
No way out. He sighed, and began reading the case notes for the blue sheet, trying to discover how an object no more dangerous then a hacky-sack had killed someone.
Do you remember the first time you ever read r4nt? I do. I remember because it was the original issue, and it wasn’t even live on the internet yet..
You can’t deny the esthetic of Apple products; you may want to in some delirious need to prove you aren’t in love with the idea, but you’d be lying to yourself
In every office I’ve ever been in people have had a tacit arrangement to accumulate swag. Not useful or fun stuff either, just random junk that proves you’re a little bit better then everyone around you.
I pray that one day the people at last throw down the shackles of EA oppression and realize that bigger and better is achieved by quality and not by the power of a corrupt and merciless Brand name.
A notorious leader of hundred of battle hardened zealots Born from the genetic material of some of histories greatest conquerors and the twisted genius of Dr. Mindbender.
You ever see those signs on the side of the road that ask “Got junk?” and then have the phone number of some lunatic with a box truck who’ll charge you fifty thousand times what the dump will charge you
How come nobody ever thought about having a show, where the contestants have a roast beef fight? You know, running around, laughing, and throwing freshly sliced, warm roast beef.
I’m telling you to laugh at the sun. Cry when your rivals fall, praise them when they do well. Clap hardest at the worst street play, believe that your power can make them better, believe you can raise the bar.
Are you Sowing the seeds of Utopia? Have you recently had a keynote speech that made my bowels shatter a toilet? Probably.
It should be mentioned that the only reason that Crom acheived the grade he did, was the already latently bizarre nature of his mode of speech.
An ego that teeters from brazenly cocky to china doll fragile like the precarious seat of an over-worked rickshaw.