Superhero, for your gums!
Ladies and Gentlemen the dating world is changing as we know it! Your dates are getting longer, and you’ve probably not even noticed the delay time to get that hot date in the sack. I’m not talking about the service you received at that shitty oval eyed restaurant, where you just blew your money on what you thought might have been chicken. I’m talking about the sad state of our movie theaters!
I swear to god if I see that “Raisins” ad one more time….
I don’t know about you, but I used to enjoy going to the movies while we paid about 7-8 bucks. You’d show up a bit early to catch the previews. Generally speaking I enjoyed watching previews. You could catch a glimpse of your favorite hottie in a killer new flick. Sometimes the previews would be really dull, but heck that’s a whole other rant. But now… Ugh the torture…
Not only do half the previews provide more entertainment value than the actual movie, they are simply deathly long in nature.
I’m really curious how this industry works, besides the fact that each movie (regardless on how brutal it is) grosses millions of dollars and the prices to watch theses movies keep going up. Sure theaters have to upgrade every so often, but heck. Ads before the lights go out, then ads when the lights finally go out, and then ads that you don’t even notice in the movie themselves. Remember that first time the lights came out and what you though was a preview to a killer new action film was actually a stupid ad? SIGH!
Fact. The reason why ads have come into the movie scene is to make sure shitty movies still make money.
I’ve provided a solution to our problem. Rather than delaying that oil change we all need, screw going to the movies on time. Heck, this world is so darn busy that we never have enough time to do what we want, don’t be silly and give “the man” all your darn money and time. LEAVE LATE! That’s my new motto. If you plan to see a movie at 9 o’clock leave at 9, and you’ll still see most of the movie (the first 10 minutes are drab anyways).
- Superhero, for your gums!
- by David Gluzman
- Published on April 1st, 2001
More from David Gluzman:
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Liberator Shapes: Wedge + Ramp Combo
I had the perfect plan: Candle light dinner, some Barry White and a glass of wine, followed with some sweet tender loving, but with a twist! What the hell is this?! Was the unfortunate reaction to my casual introduction to the huge Liberator “Ramp” lying on the bed. However after further inspection, followed …
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Day to remember
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R4NT Radio January 2008
R4NT Radio super mega action packed edition (over an hour of goodness), featuring: Joash, Dr.J, Arkestra One, Herb Alpert, Llorca, Can 7, Joey Negro, Wagon Cookin, Spank Rock, Sixtoo, Eddy Meets Yannah, Terranova, Alpha, Inina Gap and others.
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Wagon Christ – Sorry I Make You Lush
Wagon Christ tricks – woozy, gaudy, beautiful kitschtronica, the tightest, tidiest funk drummage and anus-wobbling sub bass.
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Golfing
…To clear things up, I’m referring to the daily habits of chronic internet users..
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Interview with Daedelus
I grew-up in a home full of music so it took extra time for me to really start collecting, now I’m on something like 10,000 vinyl..
Other recent features:
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Sónar 2010 – Barcelona, Spain
The festival attracts a lot of outsiders, but the Mediterranean, Spanish and more specifically Catalan nature of the people makes the festival what it is. Catalan people are passionate and this passion is infectious. The atmosphere is electric in Barcelona as a city and heightened by music and intoxicants at Sónar.
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Summer Party Naval Styles at Seven RestoLounge
Oysters, like wine are affected by terroir and these Miyagi’s flavor profiles ranged with one showing a cleaner, almost tropical profile and the other being more salty, marine driven. As I was devouring the seemingly endless plates put in front of us, I sipped on a glass of fine sauvignon blanc.
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R4NT Radio March 2010
R4NT Radio March 2010 um wow it’s been far too long since the last edition edition, featuring: Hector Hernandez, The Infesticons, Blockhead, Gramatik, Emika, Thunderheist, Parov Stelar, Eddy Meets Yannah, Anti-Pop Consortium, The Slew, Lighterthief, Andreya Triana, Parasyte Woman, Mathon, Venetian Snares, and Funki Porcini.
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O Restaurant & Lounge revisited
Calgary has a diverse set of urban communities, most of which have the ubiquitous strip mall watering hole. In the South West community of Marda Loop, a reinvention of this paradigm has been established.
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Predictions 2010.. and beyond!
So 2010 eh? Almost but not quite (no year zero they say) another decade? It seems like just yesterday that the world was waiting for Y2K. R4NT started publishing in March 2001, so we’re not quite 10 years old yet, but in internet years we are already a senior citizen.
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Invictus
No matter what, the reality of Nelson Mandela is something that deserves screen time. Should this film even remotely intrigue the masses to take interest in this figure, the world would likely benefit greatly from it.