Interview with Infinite Livez

by David Gluzman

Please welcome mild-mannered Vinnie Tiefilz, former art student, sometime comic book writer and video game designer, who was accidentally bathed in the milk of a glamour model and transformed into Infinite Livez, superhero! Along with a one-eyed teddy bear called Barry Convex, he has come to save the planet.

Except that actually it’s Inf who is the sidekick and Barry who’s running things, the former Dr Watson to the latter’s Sherlock Holmes. And while old Sherlock was partial to an armful of opium now and then, Barry’s vices are a little more exotic, his world a little stranger.

It’s a reality where a guy’s bit-on-the-side can be a monkey (“Drilla Ape”), where a whole song can be a paean to sperm (“White Wee Wee”), where video games come to life (“Spade Invaders”), where a black Bomber Command attack Parliament (“Coco Pilots”), where a man can produce enough breast milk to flood the British Isles (“The Adventures of The Lactating Man”), where selling art made out of elephant dung can be fabulously renumerative (“Claati Bros”). Oh, hang on, that last one’s actually true.

Throughout it all, Infinite manages to keep up with Mr Convex’s capricious tales and delivers them back to us with some of the tightest, most carefully structured MCing, some of the finest metaphors and imagery, some of the sharpest turns of phrase that you are likely to come across whilst snorting your drink out through your nose in horror, disgust and amusement.

Infinite was gracious enough to spend some time with the R4NT crew and deliver one of the most amusing interviews we’ve done.

David: Okay.. First things first.. What in the world is up with the puppets, and where do I get one?

Infinite Livez: The puppets are the next level in hip hop…it’s what I call “puppet-core” it aint nothing new really check the cover of Master Ace’s “Me and the Biz”. I make all my own puppets if you want one you gotta pay me cos each one is an original. E-mail me your credit card details and then we can talk.

DG: There is no question that you have some superior rhyming skills, yet your lyrics take a sharp turn toward complete obscurity. How do you find yourself creating such lyrics, what sets your mood, and how do you get into the groove?

IL: I’m just out to skank mans like dem white breahs that auction cut price electrical goods up West. People think the box has got an X-box in it, I get a few heads in the crowd to bid and act like they wanna buy it….but when the punters reach home they get nothing but a broken Amastrad and a bottle of sun tan lotion……. hahahahahahahahahahah hahahahah hahahahahahaha!!…. er wot was the question again?!!

DG: Do you Freestyle?

IL: Have you heard the one about the man that went for a piss but ended up shitting himself after he relised he had no arsehole!!

DG: Um, okay, well how about: Disco or Breakdancing?

IL: Ostrich

DG: I see, um.. Headphones or big huge megaphones?

IL: Purple

DG: Right, well onto more pertinent questions: What are you thoughts on turntablism? Do you spin? Where do you think the art is headed?

IL: I hate all turnatablism, it’s a dead art form….vocal-scratching and tape-scratching are the way forward you need to check the hidden track on Bush meat. My man Tape Salad takes care of that sumfink propa. I do alot of vocal scratching with my pedals it helps me remember what I forgot.

DG: What are your thoughts on the super hyped up American HipHop artist?

IL: They’re cool they give the worshippers a chance to praise and give thanks.

DG: I find that your writing on your website reminds me very much of the way ‘Ali G’ talks. Which reminds me do you ever hang out in ‘Stains’ if not where do you hang out?

IL: Ali who???……oh that guy that was funny at the start of the century…riiiiiight!! No I don’t hang with him I can’t afford to live up by Hampstead, my irony don’t stretch that far…..I like to hang out in libraries reading mystery novels….trying to figure out “whodunit???”

DG: While growing up, what sort of music did you listen to, and who do you think had the most influence on your art and rhymes?

IL: As a kid I spent sometime in Bali where I’d be surrounded by a lot of its indigenous music. My father used to play the Saron (Glockenspiel) in one of the most popular Gamelan ensembles of the time….So I guess you could say that his playing had an early influence on me. The Gamelan he used to play was very enchanting and still fills me with fond memories of my time in Denpasar.

DG: Thanks again for your time answering these questions. What can R4NT readers expect from Infinite Livez in the future?

IL: More wild unprotected sex with strangers, more Shadowless, more mass grave emcee burials, more Dj Blufoot, more Skinhead bashing with a van full of Brick lane Bangladeshis, more Part 2, more zazen, more Chaka, more nervous breakdowns, more Tape Salad, more bukkake drive bys, more M3, more animal porn, more Kid Acne, more suicide bombings, more Defisis, more hen parties with Lynndie England, more Ty, more Barry Convex, …..more, more, more, more, more, more likkle more.

David Gluzman